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Friday, April 13, 2018

Good Riddance, Ken Hitchcock by @Nick422

Earlier today the Dallas Stars announced that their head coach, Ken Hitchcock, would be ending his coaching career after near 20 years coaching. To this I say: Good.

While Ken Hitchcock was not THE man to bring the NHL to a grinding halt in the 90s, zapping all of the fun, skill, and speed out of a game built around solely that he was one of those who rode this strategy to some of the most success.

Winning the Stanley Cup in 1998-99 on a goal that never should have been, Hitchcock would then spend the next umpteen years claiming to be a hockey player whisperer who knew how to drain the most talent and instill the most God-awful, fun sucking discipline in to his players.

If you loved all of the worst things about hockey and wanted a small modicum of success then Ken Hitchcock was the coach for you! While only once good enough to bland his way to a Cup, even then only beating a team with Dominik Hasek and God mode and no one else of note on those Sabres team, he made the playoffs all but four times as a head coach. Good for him! Bad for hockey.

His teams consistently finished 1st in their division but constantly would flame out early. Only five times in 14 trips to the playoffs did his teams, usually regular season favorites, make it to the Conference Finals. You wanted to bet on an underdog? Look no further than who ever was playing against his Stars/Flyers/Blue Jackets (lol j/k they sucked when he was there)/Blues teams. That's when you knew the best of the best were going down.

In the end Ken Hitchcock will be known for three things:

1.) Being a dinosaur relic who insisted that safe was best, only defensive grinding matches were what would win hockey games. Just not when it mattered.

2.) Winning the only Cup in Dallas Stars history because Brett Hull's skate was in the crease.

3.) Being the idiot who perpetrated the "Crosby is a whiner" myth that stupid fans cling to with the utmost death grip.

That's right. During Sid's rookie year, as he was abused endlessly, Crosby was called a whiner by Ken Hitchcock after he said something to the refs after getting his teeth knocked out by Darien Hatcher, and then later getting a high stick by Hatcher not called.

And according to Hitchcock Crosby whined about not getting any of those called.

It's fine, though. We know how that game ended. The same way Hitchcock's career constantly went: Getting dunked on by superior talent.

12 seasons later the tally stands:

Crosby Cups- 3
Hitchcock Cups- 0

Good riddance to you, Ken Hitchcock. The game is better off without your dinosaur mentality spreading toxic ideas in to the minds of young, talented, creative players.

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