10 Facts about the Ottawa Senators by @evil_shero - PensInitiative | Pittsburgh Penguins Blog | Rumors | News

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Saturday, May 13, 2017

10 Facts about the Ottawa Senators by @evil_shero

1. Although they made it to the Eastern Conference Championships, the Senator's did it by beating the Bruins and Rangers. The Bruins were 14th in the NHL and only made the playoffs this year by a pube. The Rangers still employ that turd baby Lundqvist who might be equal or more overrated of a player who had never won anything in his lifetime. Lundqvist did the Rangers no favors by having a .905 SV% in the Senator's series.

2. Erik Karlsson chews with his mouth open. It's gross, people tell him it's gross but he does it anyways.

3. Jean-Gabriel Pageau will walk into a room and fuck around with the Thermostat. It doesn't matter if it's your house, an office, or hotel room his comfort comes before yours.

4. Bobby Ryan opens cereal boxes upside-down. He thinks it doesn't matter but it matters.

5. Mark Stone doesn't clear the microwave timer when he is done with his Hot Pockets. He's too busy to wait :02 and he doesn't care who knows it.

6.  Dion Phaneuf will read your Facebook messages and not reply until the next day. He says he wants to "digest" the information before replying. Bullshit.

7. Kyle Turris doesn't peel string cheese. He just eats the damn thing like a banana.

8. Mike Hoffman is a frequent YouTube commenter. He is that "first" guy. It's 2017 dude.

9. Derick Brassard puts back an empty Brita pitcher. Derick doesn't care if everyone else is hydrated or not; he's TOO busy to fill it back up.

10. Chris Neil only ingests farts for sustience  he takes pictures with his iPad. He has a damn phone but uses his iPad! Why does he use his iPad? He has phone!

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